Tuesday, December 08, 2015

Alaska

The weight of Brett's departure is starting to weigh on me. Of course he's working stupid hours before he goes. Feast or famine with the zoo. Couple weeks ago there wasn't much in the way of shifts to be had. But we're facing this long distance relationship. And I want to spend every minute available with him before he goes. But instead nearly every day is like today. He's working 14 hours.  I think he said originally he'd be working 50 hours this week. Pretty sure it's gone up since then. No days off together between now and this upcoming Tuesday together.

Tuesday morning I'll wake up, barely, to the sound of Brett getting last minute things together. Dim lights as he tries not to wake me. About 15m before we have to walk out he'll officially wake me up. I'll drop him at the official drop off. He will insist I don't park and come in with him. I'll hug and kiss him. He'll tell me to go home and sleep. I'll drive home with the music on and I won't hear a word. I'll climb into bed and force my eyes to close. Sleep won't come. He'll call before they fly away. He'll either call or text from Anchorage.

He'll only be gone for two weeks, then home for just under two weeks, then gone for who knows how long. February until may for the academy. Then a year in Barrow.

I'm afraid of increased isolation. I already struggle with it. I hope I do ok. I hope Brett does too.

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